ARCHIVED POSTS
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July 5, 2017
My Brawling Days Are Done, or Are They?
OLD AND TOUGH
You get old, and you get mellow, and after a while, you start thinking like an old man, which is exactly who you are. You become a kinder person, you overlook people’s flaws, and you start mistaking that for wisdom. When you look back at your younger days, you begin to think what a jerk “that guy” was.
So you move to a 55-years-old and up retirement community for “active seniors” and you settle in. Then one day, you and your wife go to breakfast at the Sandwedge, which is the cutesy name for the little coffee shop at the golf course. And while you are eating your bacon and eggs and drinking your coffee, you see an old guy with a dead snake, going over to a table where four old ladies are chatting among themselves. The old man interrupts their conversation, brandishes the snake, thrusting it toward them to give them a scare. They recoil and give him that pained smile that women get when they are pretending to be nice.
“I hope he doesn’t come over here with that thing,” my wife Carmela says, and I assure her that he won’t. So we continue our conversation about this and that, and right in the middle of our talk, the old man comes over, interrupts us, and thrusts the snake – which turns out to be a realistic looking fake – in Carmela’s face.
“Please don’t do that,” she says in a calm but curt tone. But he just laughs and does it again. And that’s when all my old man kindness and wisdom fly out the window.
“Get the f*** away from us,” I tell him loudly. The problem is, I say it so loudly, that all the folks in the restaurant stop eating and stare at us, including the old man with the snake, who looks confused.
“Get the f*** out of here,” I tell him again as I start to get up out of my seat, and at this point he flees out the door.
It would seem like mission accomplished, but to tell you the truth, I immediately felt ashamed. I try very hard to be tolerant, but I scared an old man – no matter how obnoxious he may have been. I used bad language – I don’t talk like that anymore. And I made a scene and interrupted everybody’s breakfast by picking on a senior citizen.
But when I got home, I looked in the mirror and once again rediscovered the awful truth. I’m a senior citizen too. The old man and I are probably about the same age. He didn’t have to run out the door. He could have stood his ground and told me to go f*** myself. Then we could have thrown some punches, maybe wrestled around on the floor, and gotten busted by the Sun Lakes security team.
Who knows, after it was all over, the old man and I might have had a beer and ended up being friends.
Stranger things have happened.
Do you have a dissenting opinion or any opinion at all on the subject? Contact me at george@georgeleecunningham.com and let me know. Meanwhile, you can always subscribe and get an email reminder of blog postings. Your name will not be shared and you may cancel at any time.
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June 26, 2017
LET’S CALL THEM: GENERATION SCREWED
PLEASE TATTLE ON THE DRIVER — Zazzle.com
One of the problems with getting old is that you begin to question your judgement about the new generation. They are different than we were, because – let’s face it – they live in a different world. They have different expectations, and again to be brutally honest – with some notable exceptions – they are not as prepared for life as previous generations.
Let’s call them Generation Screwed.
I don’t blame them. In fact, if there is anybody to blame it is probably my generation and the ones that followed. Not only did we not prepare the current generation to be adults, but we squandered their future. Since so many of us are living longer and retiring earlier, we are expecting them to take care of us while we loll around the golf course or vacation in Tahiti.
In many ways we have stolen their future. We let the infrastructure decay, government benefits to grow to unsustainable levels, the school system – K through college – to dissolve into mush, and the culture to coarsen to the point that incivility has become the norm.
We have convinced the upcoming generation of adults that they are special by giving them participation awards and certificates merely for existing. And companies – either in an effort to undo the damage or continue the silliness – have begun treating employees like children.
We bought a quart of Hydrangea Blue at Home Depot, and the cashier asked if we would go on line and fill out a form saying she did an excellent job. We bought some paint, she rang us up and smiled, and we, the customer, are now supposed to complete a 12-page online form saying how good she was and telling her employer about our shopping experience. To sweeten the deal, Home Depot will hold a drawing of those who respond and award the winner a $5,000 Home Depot gift card. Of course, you will have to pay income tax on your winnings, so it’s really more like $3,500 worth of Home Depot stuff. I don’t think so.
Number one, it’s a stupid idea thought up by a bunch of stupid middle managers who sat around a big table trying to justify their existence. Not many folks work on an assembly line anymore, where there’s a boss looking over their shoulders and exhorting them to work harder and faster. Now we have computers that do it, and as customers and members of the public, we are expected to help these computers to monitor company employees.
So now we see truck drivers – hard-working men and women supporting their families by spending hours each day staring at the yellow line down the middle of the highway – with a sign on the back of their trucks exhorting the rest of us to tattle on them if we think they are not driving properly.
It’s insulting and demeaning to a person doing his or her best to make a living.
Think if we did that in our personal lives. You go out on a hot date, you end up going back to your apartment or maybe a hotel room, and doing what comes naturally. Then, the next morning, you ask if your partner would like to fill out an online endorsement that you could post on your Facebook page saying how great you were.
Who knows, maybe you could even get a good Yelp review.
Do you have a dissenting opinion or any opinion at all on the subject? Contact me at george@georgeleecunningham.com and let me know. Meanwhile, you can always subscribe and get an email reminder of blog postings. Your name will not be shared and you may cancel at any time.